• News

    Men Who Love Their Cars More Than Their Wife

    I couldn’t really think of a more appropriate opening than a line from Queen’s timeless classic “I’m in Love with My Car.” In just a short and simple song, Roger Taylor has epitomised the depth of feelings many men have for their cars.

    If made to choose between their wife and their car, 3% of British men would choose the car. A recent study carried out in the UK by the AA revealed that many men are in fact in love with their cars. Further 15% would rather consider giving up booze than their car and 7% of men would abstain from their favourite food forever if it were required of them in order to be able to keep their car. The overall majority – 79% admitted they couldn’t imagine their lives without driving. So the evidence is pretty strong!

    Another study commissioned by Mens Health Network surveyed American motorists and found out that 70% of male drivers prioritise caring for their cars over caring for their own health. No wonder the same study showed 56% of women seriously worrying about their partners’ health. It seems like University of East London has unravelled the mystery. They have concluded that men love cars because they believe they’re part of them. An article by Creditplus suggests that the cause of this affection is rooted in evolution.

    Let’s look at some of the most intricate ways men express their devotion to their four-wheeled friends. But before we do, here’s an interesting factoid: most men will have more cars than women in their lives. And by the time they’re old, they’ll name you every car they’ve had since the age of 17 while they won’t be able to recall the names of at least half of the ladies they’ve known. Go figure!

    Back to the Caves

    Men came out of caves 40,000 years ago (some decided to stay, though), that’s what the scientists tell us. What they tend to elide is that some men are voluntarily returning to their caves. For fairness sake, the caves of today are more elaborate. I call them man caves. It’s the place where the man, under loud protests from his better half, stores his football memorabilia, snooker tables, dart boards, SEGA turbo and other manly whatsits.

    Some motorheads have designed man caves with their main passion in mind.

    In this example, the man works, eats and sleeps in what appears to be an oversized posh garage. Even a quick glance will tell you that this bloke has got everything he could possibly want, except for one thing. I may be mistaken but something tells me that this chap is single. Call it a hunch or maybe it’s something to do with the fold-out guest sofa.

    men-love-cars-cave2

    The second man cave has got a more modern and urban look. Is this man living in a Ferrari showroom? Joking aside, I have to applaud him for a well-balanced colour scheme. His obsession with cars is further accentuated by the swivel car seats and the fact that he’s watching Wheeler Dealers on a 60-inch flat screen telly.

    150918_garage_RRD_

    The final bit of inspiration comes from the Cadillac man himself – Tad Pierson – the second most famous Memphian after Elvis Presley. He is a tour guide driving a pink 1955 Cadillac and he has shown the sights of Memphis to many a happy tourist. When he’s not touring the city, he retires to his man cave which screams 1950s and Rock ‘n’ Roll. Tad’s home is set up in a large garage and he sleeps inside a vintage Airstream trailer to ward off the smell of petrol (sorry, I mean gas).

    men-love-cars-pierson

    Taking it to Extremes

    Ok, it’s one thing sleeping next to a car. That’s normal (huh?) An entirely different thing is sleeping with a car. Did you hear about the man who is planning to marry his Volkswagen Beetle? I do hope the car is registered before 1998 or he might get into serious trouble. I’ll leave it with Jalopnik to explain this in more detail while we’re quickly moving on to things that are more tasteful and appropriate for a car-loving gentleman.

    Car Furniture

    Those who are trying to keep a low profile with their motoring antics, can make a subtle statement with car-themed furniture. The Ferrari beds that most household catalogues sell are likely to be too short for the majority of car enthusiasts, that’s why most of the car furniture comes under the custom category. These examples make the green Top Gear Rolls-Royce sofa look like a bit of an understatement.

    men-love-cars-furniture2

    men-love-cars-jakeschopshop-com

    Cars should be kept clean

    Judging by the established cliché – men like watching women wash cars. However, there’s a strong evidence supporting the assumption that very few men would entrust their wives or girlfriends with the important task of car grooming.

    men-love-cars-lovebug-lohan

    Consider these figures: last year the U.S. car body care industry was worth approximately $8 billion. Mens toiletries and cosmetics? Currently lingering somewhere between $2 and $2.5 billion per year and is expected to reach $3.2 billion by 2016. For every dollar men spend on moisturiser and lip balm, they spend almost $4 on car shampoo and the latest wax formula that guarantees to remove minor scratches and bring back that showroom shine!

    Having a pack of car wipes is essential too, otherwise if you don’t have one at hand, you might end up with the same dilemma as the man from the Volkswagen’s viral video that they made a couple of years ago. Not very viral, though. Do I hear another cringe alert coming along?

    How is it with you? Do you think you might be among those 3% who’d dump their girlfriend if the car asked you to?

     

     

     

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  • News

    The 5 Best Cars To Have Sex In

    the best cars to have sex in

    So, its Valentines Day; romance is in the air and many of you will be getting your love groove on. For those horn dogs interested or those who fancy spicing up their bedroom activities then this guide is for you.

    Here are the most common vehicle types, and their sexual options.  Positions at the ready!

    The top 5 cars to have sex in. Let’s go….

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 1: Mid-to-Full-Size Sedans/Coupes (with at least a bench rear seat)

    These are very common, and the answer is fairly easy: get in the back. A bench rear seat allows for the largest variety of options, and most of the major humanly-achievable sexual positions are available.

    Pros: Relatively easy, common
    Cons: Limited headroom limits some options.

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 2: Compact to Sub-Compact 4-Seater cars (with at least one bench seat)

    Also a very common option, these cars work similarly to the mid-to-full sedans, but the much more restricted space brings up new challenges. The optimal location is the back seat, but unlike full-sized sedans, you really need to move the front seats as far forward as possible, and likely fold the front backrests forward as well (for 2-door cars that allow this for rear-seat entry).

    Also, on little cars, you’ll make much greater use of grab handles and straps. For example, on vintage Beetles and many other cars, there are these passenger assist straps that look sort of like gynecological foot straps. Which should give an idea of how handy they can be. Use them to help maneuver, support your weight, etc. Almost all cars have at least some of these, usually above the side windows, so make sure to employ them.

    Pros: Easy to find secluded parking, very intimate. Ability to brace against car body may offer interesting options.
    Cons: Pretty cramped in there. High probability of sprains and car parts getting in on the fun.

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 3: Wagons, hearses, wagon-based delivery vehicles

    Easy! Fold down the back seat, and you’ve got essentially a bed! Some blankets can be great if you happen to have some, but they’re not essential. There’s restricted headroom, so keep that in mind— most positions will by necessity tend to be more horizontal.

    Pros: Easy, comfortable
    Cons: It’s probably your mom’s wagon.

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 4: Vans (even minivans), enclosed trucksP

    Are you kidding? You barely have to plan anything. I’ve had friends in NYC apartments with less room for fucking than you’d have in almost any van. Pretty much everything works here that doesn’t require special large apparatuses or heavy equipment. Have fun.P

    Pros: It’s basically a sex-room on wheels. Why do you think these were so popular in the ’70s?
    Cons: Pedos know this as well.

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 5: Two-seater enclosed cars, or larger cars without bench seating anywhere

    Things get trickier here. some cars don’t have rear benches, exactly, but a pile of clothes or something can cover the non-seat middle and make it close enough — the Porsche Panamera is an example of this. But some just won’t work this way— there’s only bucket seats available. In these cases. you’ll need to limit your positioning to combinations that allow two of you in one seat, or permit one partner to bridge the non-seat area. Be wary of parking brake levers and gearshifts! Those things can hurt.

    Pros: These cars usually often can make people want to have sex with you in the first place.
    Cons: It’s really, really tight in there. You could end up Siamese’d.

    BONUS Car: Summer Time Loving

    How To Have Sex In Any Kind Of Car

    Fornication Location Class 6: Convertibles, Roadsters, And Other Open Vehicles (including open-bed pickup trucks)P

    With these, the issue becomes more about where you’re parking than where in the car you’re playing. A closed car can at least pretend to be a private space — an open Miata, though, would be like having sex in a horse trough. Not private at all.

    So, for these cars, the physical options are greater, since headroom is infinite, and you can use rollbars and windshield frames, etc to help support things. You’re more having sex on the car than in it with these, and while that can work, be wary of hot and/or cold metal surfaces on tender bare skin.

    Pickup trucks fit in this category because the logistics are more based on overall location as well— that open bed gives you as much flexibility as a van, but with zero privacy. Also, blankets are probably a good idea for a truck bed, which will likely be hot or cold, and often filled with uncomfortable ridges. And probably leaves, beer cans, screws, nails, sawblades, angry raccoons, etc.

    Pros: In the right environment, this can be incredible.
    Cons: Having “F-150” burned backwards on your ass.

    via Jalopnik

    The 5 Best Cars To Have Sex In The 5 Best Cars To Have Sex In The 5 Best Cars To Have Sex In The 5 Best Cars To Have Sex In

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